Ever experienced one of those mornings where you awaken feeling like the cosmos has bestowed upon you the keys to a splendid day?
The sunlight beams brightly, your beloved tune plays on repeat, and even your breakfast seems crafted by the brunch deities themselves. Ah, yes, I savoured one of those gilded mornings.
However, little did I anticipate that I was on the brink of encountering the most chilling, bewildering high of my existence.
The scenario
It was a sun-drenched Saturday afternoon, the type of day that calls for carefree antics with friends or a laid-back Netflix marathon. After luxuriating in a lie-in until 1 PM, I opted for the former.
The morning routine flowed seamlessly—shower, check; Clash of Clans, no raids, check; scrambled eggs and toast, utterly scrumptious. Every detail pointed towards an extraordinary day ahead.
The default choice
With no other plans in sight, I messaged the lads: “What’s the plan?” Bob responded with a definitive, “I dunno, let’s check.”
The dreaded no-plan Saturday had arrived, signifying one thing—time for the default choice: let’s just smoke.
Bob’s basement served as our designated chill spot for reasons too enticing to resist:
- Plush couches adorned with an abundance of cushions
- A snack cupboard that could rival a 7-Eleven
- Bob’s dog, Walter, an absolute legend
You know the drill. We rolled up, sparked up, and passed it around. And that’s when the night transitioned from chill to spine-chilling.
Heading for a night out? Discover your perfect THC hit for the occasion.
The ascent to mount zonked
I don’t know what got into me that night. Maybe it was the alignment of the stars or just my inner daredevil peaking, but I was hitting that joint like my life depended on it. “How high can I really get?” Famous last words, right? Turns out, pretty damn high.
The munchie phenomenon
As we delved deeper into our high, the munchies hit—hard. I was so invested in my pizza pops that I became one with them.
It was a culinary soul merge, an epic snacking experience. Just when I thought I was the king of the snack world, reality—or rather, my overzealous high—decided to slap me right in the face.
The haunting forest jaunt
Opting for a breath of fresh air, we decided to step outside. What began as a sunny day had transformed into a dark, chilly, and enigmatic night. Our destination? The eerie forest near Bob’s house.
“Don’t worry, I’ve been here a million times,” Bob reassured us as we entered what resembled a scene from a horror film. Leaves rustled ominously, shadows danced amidst the trees, and my intoxicated mind was convinced that every sound posed a potential threat.
The paranoid trek
Rain began to pour just five minutes into our walk, transforming our leisurely stroll into a survival ordeal. I was too high to function, and every raindrop felt like a conspiracy against me. My steps were unsteady, my thoughts raced, and then… the bushes rustled.
“What was that?!” I whispered, half expecting a ghostly figure to emerge. “It’s just rain, mate, you’re stoned,” Bob replied.
But I remained unconvinced. As we made our way back, the reality of my paranoia sank in—I was amidst the most terrifying high of my life.
Assurances & Vouches
The coyote encounter
As if the universe hadn’t messed with me enough, we encountered what looked like a demon coyote pack eyeing us like late-night snacks.
At that moment, I saw my life flash before my eyes—I was a headline, “Local Stoner Eaten by Coyotes.”
But then, out of nowhere, Bob, fuelled by the sheer power of our earlier Zaza session, drop-kicked a coyote, sending them scattering into the night. It was both terrifying and hilarious—definitely not your typical Saturday night.
The aftermath
We made it back to Bob’s, shaken but safe. I collapsed onto the couch, my heart still racing from the adventure. Walter, the dog, came by to check on us, probably wondering why his humans were acting weirder than usual.
After more pizza pops and several deep breaths, I could finally laugh at the ordeal. We had survived our trip to the shadow realm courtesy of our trusty friend, cannabis.
Disclaimer: The information provided on this page is for educational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. Always consult with a healthcare professional before using any THC product.
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